How often do you reflect on your days? How regularly do you stop and think and ponder and wonder and unravel things in your mind – or even let your mind unravel?
It’s important. Really.
I’ve learned so much today, by thinking a little obliquely about the day that was, and yes, reflecting.
Today I realised that I feel a lot like Charlie Brown in the Snoopy / Peanuts movie. I often feel like I’m the guy who tries really hard and then messes everything up at the last second. I cried buckets at the end of the movie when the Little Red-Haired Girl explains why she chose Charlie Brown as her Summer pen-pal.
Here’s the dialogue, straight from IMDB:
Little Red-Haired Girl: Oh, hi, Charlie Brown.
Charlie Brown: You remembered my name?
Little Red-Haired Girl: Of course I did.
Charlie Brown: Before you leave, there’s something I really need to know. Why, out of all the kids in our class, would you want to be partners with me?
Little Red-Haired Girl: That’s easy. It’s because I admire the type of person you are.
Charlie Brown: An insecure, wishy-washy failure?
Little Red-Haired Girl: That’s not who you are at all. You showed compassion for your sister at the talent show. Honesty at the assembly. And at the dance, you were brave yet funny. And what you did for me, doing the book report while I was away, was so sweet of you.
This scene killed me. I was wiping streaming tears off my face as discreetly as I could, because if my daughter saw me, she would loudly ask (with no shame and considerable glee): “Are you CRYING?!”
On one level, it’s the climax of the film where the hero gets the girl, and they all live happily ever after. Obviously it’s tear-jerking emotional territory.
But on a deeper level it showed me how much I needed to see Charlie Brown win today; I had projected myself so far into the story, and I was the guy I really needed to see win.
I realised – after some reflection – how often in my life I feel (and have felt) like an insecure, wishy-washy failure. It gave me some peace to see Charlie Brown win, but it highlighted something else in me that clearly needs some work.
A grease and oil change for the subconscious, perhaps?!
With love & wellness,